I work at a deli/cheese shop. I quite like my job, actually - then douchebags like this walk in.
Customer: I'd like that chicken salad sandwich on wheat? The one in front? With the cucumbers on it?
Me: Sure! Can I get you anything else today?
Customer: Yeah. Can you do me a favor and take the cucumbers off for me?
And because I'd prefer to keep my job, I walked into the back, unwrapped the sandwich, removed the offending cucumbers, and re-wrapped the sandwich.
It just occured to me that I totally should have spit on it or something.
Not that I would ever do that.
My question is twofold: Why couldn't he remove the cucumbers himself? And what is so wrong with cucumbers anyway? They don't taste like anything! They are basically water in green, phallic form!
Anyone have an answer?